10 Signs You May be the Trashiest House on the Block

If you’re reading this there is a good chance you didn't have the nicest house in the neighborhood... but were you the worst?

As suburban dirtbags, my mom's main goal was to not be the worst looking house on the street - which was tough to accomplish with a dilapidated basketball net and tire marks on the front yard from my stepdad.

Here are a few indicators (in no particular order) that you may have been the dirtbags of the block.

1. There is a vehicle that does not run parked in the driveway, street, or god forbid the yard.

2. Your Christmas decorations are up and it's the middle of the summer.

 Use the excuse that it's almost Christmas in July. 

3. The next-door neighbors built a super tall fence to block the view of your property. 

It wasn't trashy for Tim the Tool Man Taylor!

4. There is a group of teenagers hanging and smoking in the garage. 

Negative points if you don't know their names. 

5. You have a dog that lives primarily outside. 

It's a she, and her name is Bentley. 

6. There are broken appliances visible from the street. 

There is a sign that says "FREE" and you can't believe no one has picked it up. 

7. There is a ladder on the side of the house. 

That thing is over 10 feet tall - where else are you supposed to store it?

8. You have a blue tarp covering any portion of the house.

Roof, siding, window...  

9. Your grass is fucked up.

Too long is bad, or even worse -- filled with dead spots. 

10. There is a defunct satellite dish.

Nothing screams trash like Dish Network - and it don't even get the Eagles game. 

Hopefully you take it upon yourself to fix the transgressions you may have and make sure that the neighbors stop talking shit about you - and focus on someone else. 

- AYG