Gang - in our latest episode, we found out how Kippy met his wife!!!
Did youse applaud his "cool guy" line or say "No way that actually worked!"
Well... it did work. And without the Rico Suave act, none of you would be reading this right now! All is to say...
Dirtbags can get lucky. And who is to say that that Dirtbag can't be you? Here's
* These are (mostly) anonymous stories from the internet. Name have been removed to protect the safety of said Dirtbags.
I remember a girl in college at a party asked if I wanted to play Pearl Harbor. I said it depends on what it was.
“You be Pearl Harbor, I’ll be a kamikaze and blow the hell out of you.”
So that, on top of her being easy, worked on me lol. The historical analogy was a nice touch.
Freshman year of college, there was this sort of cute, sort of funny guy that was very flirty. However, within the first WEEKEND everyone had found him out because he had not just a move, but a whole performance down pat.
He'd meet a girl, get her to go back to his dorm - cuz ya know, where else could you possibly hang out? And then he'd play a song on his acoustic guitar that he wrote - where he'd weave in the girl's name.
Worked on quite a handful of ladies... But proud to say, not me.
He coaches kids basketball now (and does not have any kids).
This guy who clearly likes me (has been hitting on me for weeks) was like “hey, you need to hold this” as he had his hand curled in a fist, hiding whatever would be in his hand. He then grabs my hand to put whatever it is in my hand, but just ends up uncurling his fist and interlocking his fingers with mine.
I died laughing. It was quite charming.
An age-old honored tradition amongst Dirtbags - this one is simple enough to work every time and bold enough they think you have money.
You walk straight up to a girl and say,
"Hey... Nice <INSERT NOUN>. Wanna fuck?"
You can try "haircut" or "shoes" or "ass" or "jeans"... the list goes on.
Bonus points if you can make ALSO a joke about getting into those jeans.
I'm no rooster, but watch what this cocklldootoyou.
My girlfriend gained a few pounds and was worried that I no longer found her attractive. I assured her that added mass only made her more attractive.
While avoiding a drunk girl at a Halloween party who was stalking me I ducked behind a group of girls and asked one if she would pretend to be my girlfriend so this other girl would leave me alone. Someone walked up and handcuffed us together with fake handcuffs and we started dating. Now we’re married.
A girl (that was my height) walked up and said, let's see which one of us is taller. We faced each other to measure up and she kissed me.
A guy in a wheelchair stopped me on the street and said, "Hey baby, you need a ride?"
Hello. I have a vagina - if you are interested.
I was working as a drive-through teller at a bank. She sent a note up through the tube that said "I'd like to withdraw your phone number."
Married over 8 years now...
Girl asked me to show her my new iphone. She asked me how to enter new contacts and put in her number.
I had a girl do this to me CONSTANTLY. "Feeel how cold my hands are" and I'd warm em up.Or "feel my nails"or "braid my hair"And a bunch of other stuff that after a while I figured she was trying to give me a hint.So I asked her out. She said no.
I figured, since she was the best human on earth, I'd just enjoy every moment I had with her anyway and not push it.She kept doing it, and other things that according to other female insight I requested, were strong hints. We've even stayed together in the same hotel room on a trip to save $. (seperate beds)Another year goes by so I asked her out again. No.
So I go back to just enjoying our thoroughly enjoyable friendship.We have both been singles since we met about 7 years ago.
Then she moved away about six months ago. We still txt each other all the time. I'd marry her in a heartbeat.
Anyway, the point is, if a girl does something like that it doesn't always mean she's into you. Maybe she just trusts you.
Let us know in the comments below!
And we'll see ya on 9/13 for the premiere of our new special, on YouTube!
As always - Love youse
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